Baby Boom or Bust; the Last Stand of Funeral Service

I have just finished reading a very interesting article about where the future of the funeral industry is headed. Please read and post your thoughts. -- Matt Frazer, President at Frazer Consultants



Baby Boom or Bust; the Last Stand of Funeral Service
By Karl E. Jennings, CEO
Healing Farewell Center of America & Borek Jennings Funeral Homes

What could modern funeral service in 2011 and a battle fought at the Alamo 175 years ago possibly have in common? Frankly, not much, except for the facts that for both there came a time when a line had to be drawn, commitments had to be made and destinies were forever forged.

On March 6, 1836, Colonel William B. Travis and his soldiers were faced with a crushing number of Mexican soldiers led by General Santa Anna. The odds were overwhelmingly against them. As hope was quickly fading; Colonel Travis called his soldiers together and then drew a line in the dirt. He then asked any man willing to stay and fight to step across the line and join him on the other side … only one declined.

Colonel Travis required those committing to move forward. Why didn't he simply ask those unwilling to fight to step back? Remember these words from Dale Carnegie, "Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” Colonial Travis and the soldiers at the Alamo knew what they believed in and were willing to pay the ultimate price to defend it.

As with the overwhelming forces closing in on Colonel Travis, so to the funeral industry has slowly been surrounded by forces, both scattered and organized, that are eroding the necessity and relevancy of our profession. The time has come for funeral directors to draw a line in the dirt, take a hard look in the mirror and choose what hill they are willing to die on. If you don't choose, it likely will be chosen for you. In the next 10 years even the gains made by the emerging baby boomer market won't be enough to keep us professionally relevant or financially viable.

Our industry has been in a passive and seemingly defenseless position as we've faced a relentless pounding of negative media for almost 40 years. In response to this, many in our industry seem to be hostile and, at a minimum, detached from clients who more and more frequently reject their current service/merchandise offerings. While some are attempting to respond to this development by expanding their services to include catering and pet disposition services; most are still just attempting to survive. For both, I pose two questions:

1. Do you really think families would reject your services if they believed you could actually help them?


2. Do you really think families believe buying any kind of merchandise item -- casket, urn, vault or keepsake -- will help them begin healing? 

Given the way the vast majority of funeral homes present their services and merchandise, it shouldn't be surprising that their clients don't see the value. This disconnect was institutionalized by the FTC Rule. Nowhere in the FTC requirements will you find anything that mentions what benefit clients receive for what they pay. The fundamental question the modern consumer asks when spending their money is, “What's in it for me?” It is the failure to connect our services and merchandise fees with a value or benefit to the purchaser that has our profession on the brink.

If you really believe the funeral is for the living, what are you doing for the living besides being kind, compassionate and caring? Today, you don't get much credit for being kind and very often it barely earns you a seat at the table. Candidly, the more I step back and view our industry from the outside, the more I realize how insulated we've become; surrendering our profession to indifference, cynics, fads and fluff.

This was never more obvious to me than when I attended a convention, for the first time in 20 years, and was saddened to find that so little had changed. To no surprise, I found row after row of casket, vault, urn and monument companies desperately trying to put new lipstick on an old pig. The fads and fluff were different 20 years ago … but no less out of touch. No matter how you personalize metal, wood, granite or plastic, it is a commodity that cannot guide the wounded, educate the lost, support the needy and empower the helpless. Remember this, if a casket-vault-cremation merchandise supplier is your primary source of innovation and marketing, you've surrendered your professional identity to someone who is selling to you … not your customer. How has that worked for you over the past 25 years?

The dominance of the retail-based approach to providing products to our clients is what has led them to conclude that we have betrayed their best interest. Some of you may be put off by the word betrayal. The betrayal of a client occurs if you act in a way that you know you shouldn't, or you don't act in a way that you know you should; whether you act intentionally or not. Ask yourself: At the most difficult moment of your life, would you really want to sit across from someone who has disguised a good, better and best merchandising approach beneath the veneer of compassionate care for your most emotionally vulnerable needs?

Our clients think merchandise offerings of all kinds are a necessary evil. I thought this back in mortuary school 30 years ago and still believe it today. Every time you sell something other than experiences that will help your family heal, they think you are a salesperson they must protect themselves from, not a professional that they can trust.

If this is the hill you've chosen to die on, the bugler will shortly be playing taps.


A Three Fold Initiative to Transform the Funeral Industry

I. Establish a new Body of Knowledge, Professional Language and Universal Narrative
A new body of knowledge must be established that encompasses the ten-day period following a death. We call this the Acute Loss Period and apply an intentional plan using our Acute Loss Management System to educate and deliver value to every family. The acute loss period begins the first moment we hear the news that someone has died and continues to the beginning of a healthy grief experience. There are essential steps each family must go through to begin a healthy grief cycle. Healing language is therapeutic, interactive and educational and provides the client with a clear answer to their most poignant needs at the time of loss.

This new language describes experiences that overtly help families attend to their emotional, relational and spiritual needs regardless of the type of disposition a family chooses. In this model we are no longer funeral directors, but guides and teachers of the Acute Loss Period. We join the healing professions and have an intentional plan to provide palliative care to the surviving in the days immediately following loss. Those who embrace the idea of healing must educate themselves on the Acute Loss Period and the language of healing. Those who have mastered the knowledge and language must transform their service offerings to include healing support services that aid every generation of the bereaved.

We all know that we don't have funerals for the dead. We have funerals to help the living begin healing. Knowing this is true and having an intentional plan to teach, guide and consistently deliver these experiences enables the client to see “the invisible” value of what we can do to help them. Today's client wants to know what's in it for them. During the arrangement process the presentation of the healing narrative must drip with truth, integrity and authenticity. It must provide a map of the experience of loss that enables the client to foresee things they haven't considered, and be empowered as a collaborative partner in caring for their family. It is the only way to gain a hearing from a skeptical audience, establish expertise and recapture the confidence of today's consumer.

The human experience with loss is one of the most profound experiences any human being will have. Although, we won't be in this position forever, as of right now, only funeral directors are in a position to provide the education, guidance and support most families need during the first ten days following a loss. Failure to assume these roles reduces the funeral director to a data-taker, logistics planner, merchandise retailer, options presenter and compassionate provider of remains processing. These roles are not the generous neutral activity of a professional, but the detached minimalist behavior of the inadequate.

I've heard the voices of countless kind, caring and committed funeral directors bemoaning my assessment of their arrangement styles and responsibilities. I would advise each to be careful not to confuse your personal traits with the ability to educate, guide and support a family with an intentional plan to nurture their healing. One of the biggest obstacles to achieving a universal language and narrative is that so many are willing to be rejected professionally as long as the family appears to like and/or appreciate them personally. Imagine the oncologist who sought personal acceptance over professional relevance. Would it lead her to tell her patients that they could choose or make up any cure they wanted for the cancer that was killing them? If she did this, her patients may love her for the moment, but not much longer than that.

II. Educate: Defending the Healing Narrative
After five years of working with funeral homes from one side of the country to the other. There is one problem that is universal and was best expressed by a receptionist at a funeral home we work with. She stated, “I get so frustrated, because I see the value of what we do every day, but don't know how to explain it to someone else.”

Sadly, it's approaching 50 years since Jessica Mitford fired a shot into the hull of our industry's ship, and we still are stalled in harbor; analyzing damage and unable to offer a coherent rebuttal. We've been taking on water as one NFDA president after another, one mortuary school after another, one convention after another, and one receptionist after another, continues to accurately identify the problem, but fails to offer solutions.

The Healing narrative involves a thorough understanding of the emotional, relational and spiritual needs and experiences of those who have suffered loss and the seven phases of the Acute Loss Period. We must offer, as part of our Basic Services, experiences that present a therapeutic, interactive and educational value to each generation of the families we are privileged to serve.

The Healing narrative and language will provide the industry with a universal message and rebuttal that is necessary to establish educational talking points. These talking points can be formatted into every form of media available in individual markets. Additionally, each funeral home must execute a deep grass roots educational campaign that spans three years and touches every organization in communities that have funeral homes. Our numbers, position and influence still allow us the opportunity to aggressively re-educate our clients before the baby-boom market emerges. Make no mistake -- this is the line that is drawn in the dirt -- for the funeral business it will be baby boom or bust.

III. Execute: Delivering the Healing Narrative
Providing experiences and support services that nurture the human experience during the Acute Loss Period and attending to the emotional, relational and spiritual needs of the surviving are the delivery components of the Acute Loss Management System. The death of a loved one is a life-changing experience. We don't have to create the opportunity, it is being handed to us to nurture. To do this we have an intentional plan to help the surviving to begin healing during this life-changing experience; this is the last and best chance for funeral service to evolve. Do not mistake this for grief counseling. That is still an essential service following the Acute Loss Period.

We must teach each family that funerals help to begin a healthy grieving experience for the living. The family planner(s) must learn the seven essential phases their family must successfully navigate to nurture their emotional, relational and spiritual needs. This presentation will help the client recognize that successful navigation of these phases requires a plan for every generation in their family. Additionally, every funeral home should have a plan that assists a family in navigating the Acute Loss Period regardless of disposition.

Good education-based questions will help the family determine that this is a process they cannot avoid. The family must consider how their choices will engage their extended family and friends. The family needs to consider what support they will provide for children and have, thereunto, interactive activities for each generation in their family. The plan should explain to the family that failure to have a plan to deal with the emotional, relational and spiritual needs of the surviving may cause unresolved grief. When complete, the plan needs to become the new definition of Basic Services of funeral director and staff. If this body of knowledge and points of engagement, education and execution become the mainstay of dialogue of every funeral director and staff person, we could transform the view of funeral services within 10 years.

Retraining an industry to help a family understand and assess their emotional, relational and spiritual needs, without sounding like or attaching merchandise sales to the presentation, is the most obvious and intimidating path forward. The Healing Farewell Center of America has made it our mission to bring healing farewells to one family, one funeral home and one community at a time. We have the body of knowledge, the professional language and healing narrative to transform our industry. We ask you to consider joining our cause. Make no mistake, it is also our Alamo moment. The line is drawn, become part of the healing professions or perish. Cross the line, you will enter the battle. There still is time. Fail to cross and you have surrendered already.

Funeral Webcasting Brings Families Together

Funeral webcasting is becoming increasingly popular in small towns, big cities and around the world. Thanks to new funeral software, it's now possible to attend a funeral from anywhere in the world. 

Often families would receive that fateful call that a relative or friend has passed away. From that moment on, life gets turned upside down. Nothing but questions come to mind and all efforts focus on arrangements that need to be made. Out of town relatives and friends feel they need to drop what they're doing, and find a way to attend the funeral and to be there for the family. Unfortunately, that's not always possible. Sometimes illness, financial constraints, family or work responsibilities prevent the bereaved from attend a funeral.

In my case, I received a call from my college friend letting me know that her mother had passed away. I was leaving for a business trip to Colorado the next morning for a meeting that was months in the making. There was no way I could miss it. Yet, at the same time I was heartbroken for my friend and her family. I wanted to be there for her and at the funeral in New York. But, it just wasn't possible. My meeting was in Denver on Tuesday morning, her mother's funeral was in Long Island that same afternoon. I went to my meeting. My friend went to her mother's funeral. I sent flowers and a card. I felt awful. Now, visiting my friend, even years later, when her Mom is mentioned, I still feel a twang of guilt that I wasn't at her funeral.

Today, the internet is bringing people closer together and connecting friends, relatives and business associates in ways some never thought possible. Because of the push for new technology, software and other online applications, even the way people attend a funeral is now changing too. One particular type of funeral software even makes it possible to practically be in two places at once.

If a friend or relative can't attend a funeral in person, for whatever reason, this great technology called funeral webcasting can allow the person to attend the service anyway. With funeral webcasting, no matter where in the world you are, you can attend a funeral service from the comfort of your own home via the internet.
Mourners will be given the website address, a user id and password. Once they log on, they'll have the ability to view the funeral webcast live, streamed over the internet. But, that's not all. Should they not be available at the time of the actual funeral, they can still view the funeral webcast later.

Any funeral home can provide funeral webcasting. All they need is a simple set up with a video camera, a computer and funeral webcasting software. In minutes they'll be able to provide a service that, trust me, will be remembered for years to come. No longer will families miss their loved ones funerals because of the high cost of travel, poor health or other personal or work constraints.

The best place on the internet to learn more about funeral webcasting software is Frazer Consultants. This company has a solid reputation of developing high performing and reliable technology for the death care industry. For more information, please Frazer Consultants website or call 866-372-9372.

What You Need from Your Funeral Webcasting Provider

Thinking about offering funeral webcasting? As with any new product or service your funeral home may offer, selecting a funeral webcasting software company should be researched thoroughly before implementing. Nothing is more frustrating than partnering with a company or purchasing a product and then finding out the sales person left out a few important details. Or, that features you thought were included haven't even been added to that model or addition. Often not knowing what to ask or what to look for in the product or service is the problem.

To help get you up to speed on the latest in funeral webcasting, here are a few points you should consider when selecting a funeral webcasting provider:

1) Webcasting Equipment
Let's face it, not everyone was born with the technology gene. Few could decide one day to implement funeral webcasting, go out and buy the right equipment and software, get it all hooked up and be ready to use during a service later that day. Having said that, not only should you be sure the funeral technology company you're considering provides you a detailed list of what funeral webcasting equipment is needed to get started, but also that they can give you specific instructions on how to set it up too.

2) Software Support
No matter how comprehensive an instruction pamphlet may be or how detailed the menus on a software program are, until you've sat down in front of it and tried it out, you never know what kind of questions you may have. Therefore, partnering with a company that lets you preview the software and one that also has twenty-four hour a day, seven days a week support is important. What happens when you have an early morning funeral and have a funeral webcasting question? Submitting a help ticket just isn't going to cut it at that point.

3) New Versions or Discontinued Technology
Currently, there are over ten funeral webcasting providers within the profession. Did you know that nine out of ten use the same outdated backend technology? They use the old windows media encoder that is scheduled to be discontinued fairly soon and is not even available for download on Microsoft’s website anymore. Be sure to find out what kind of technology your provider is using so there are no surprises later. Look for a company using the newest Microsoft expression encoder.

4) Comprehensive Editing Features
Finding a funeral webcasting authority that offers features that no other company offers will help ensure you have selected the most innovative software. For example: editing capabilities that allow you to crop the beginning or the end of the video and add captions to the funeral webcast are not standard features in most funeral webcasting software programs. In fact, only one company offers these two important benefits.

5) Top Notch Distribution
Another major component to successful funeral webcasting is the backend server technology that a provider might use. Currently, to our knowledge, there is only one company that uses a tier one content delivery network. That means worldwide global distribution at unbelievable speeds.

Keeping up with technology can be challenging, but following these simple guidelines should help you breeze through selecting a funeral technology provider to implement funeral webcasting -- no matter what your technical abilities.

The industries leader in funeral webcasting is Frazer Consultants. As the only provider using the newest Microsoft expression encoder, a tier one content delivery network and the most complete, top of the line editing features, and the most personalized online player that creates an unbelievable experience for your families, Frazer Consultants stands apart from the crowd. Shouldn't your funeral webcasts do the same?

For more information about funeral webcasting, visit the premier place on the web Frazer Consultants.

Producing Video Tributes In-House, Versus Outsourcing

As a funeral home, you have two choices on how you want to produce your video tributes. Do them yourself in-house, or hire an outside provider. Ten years ago, hiring your video tributes to an outside provider was probably more common than it is today. As technology has progressed and companies like Frazer Consultants have appeared with an all-in-one-suite that makes the DVD production so easy, it doesn’t really make sense to outsource anymore.

There are several factors on why it makes more sense to produce your video tributes in-house, verses outsourcing. I’ll step through each and every one.


1. Cost: Most outsourced providers charge between $100-$200 dollars and limit the size of the video to 20-30 photos. If you go above and beyond the standard number of photos, they charge you an additional per photo charge. If you produce your video tributes in-house, you might be looking at a cost of around $15-20 and you can do as many photos as you wish. Not to mention, you can also produce as many additional copies as you want at no additional charge.

2. Time and Convenience: Do you think it is really more convenient to outsource your video tributes? Not exactly. Think about it, most out sourcing companies require you to scan in all the photos, email the photos, download the completed video, and then burn the disk. If you are going to complete all those steps, why not just put together rest of the video yourself? Matter a fact, I’d argue with anyone that putting the video tribute together is the easy part. The hard part is meeting with the family, collecting the photos and scanning the photos. Also, what happens if the family brings the photos in at last minute? There is no way possible an outsourced solution provider is going to be able to create a tribute video in time.

3. Quality: This is a big one. Over the past couple weeks I have posted a few other blog posts about tribute videos. I had two separate out sourced solution providers comment that funeral homes are not capable of producing the same kind of quality. My reply was, post an example of your tribute video and let’s compare. Out of the two solution providers, guess how many of them posted an example? Zero!

The truth is, the list could go on and on about why you should do your own tribute videos in-house. But I’ll rest with the top three main points above. If you’re looking for the ultimate tribute video software that creates the highest quality video tribute, in short amount of time, and at an affordable cost, look no further then Frazer Consultants all-in-one-suite the Tribute Center.

Printing Funeral Stationery on Demand

Creating personalized funeral stationery on demand is what leading funeral homes are doing. Shouldn't your funeral home keep up with the times as well?

Pre-printed funeral stationery is a thing of the past. As times change, new opportunities to enhance a life celebration are created. Providing client families with the next generation of personalized funeral stationery is one great option. Thankfully, with new technology, all things are possible and they're easy too!

With print-on-demand funeral register books and funeral stationery, you get the best of everything. Personalization has never been easier. Cutting edge funeral software programs provide death care professionals with over 450 themes to offer. Because of this, funeral stationery can be easily personalized to any interest, hobby, occupation, or religious background. Using simple to use, menu driven software templates, just a simple stack of blank perforated stock and a printer, in minutes you can create register books, prayer cards, thank you cards, funeral programs, bookmarks, funeral candles and more.

Client families will be extremely pleased at the selection, quality and keepsakes created. So, not only is this a win for the funeral home and the office staff, but it’s a win for the families you serve as well.

Still on the fence? If your funeral home has been thinking about changing from traditional pre-printed stationery for the new, blank stock print-on-demand system, here's why you're headed in the right direction:

1) With pre-printed stationery, you're truly limited in choice and options for true personalization.

2) Pre-printed stock is an inventory nightmare. Funeral homes are constantly running out of one theme or another and need to rush orders to get in time for the funeral.

3) Families want more. There's a reason the buzz word for death care professionals in 2011 is personalization -- it's what families want.
With the new year unfolding, now is the time to say good-bye to your old, outdated funeral stationery, and get started enhancing the level of personalization you provide.

With Frazer Consultants new Tribute Center software, makes printing-on-demand so simple, your families will thank you time and time again. For more information about the ultimate in funeral stationery and the latest generation funeral software, visit Frazer Consultants.